Is it almost Thursday already.

Man, I feel like a binge drinker sometimes. Except the drink is just busyness. I lose days here and there to it, wake up in a stupor and think, what the hell? Wasn't it just the beginning of the week a few hours ago?

Just got back from class. Geez Leweez you would think the guy would give us a break once in a while and let us out at say, 9:45. I am so no good for anything after nine thirty anyway, the last half hour I am just on note-taking autopilot. But it was a good class. I am always glad I managed to pull the children off my body and get there.

I have a group presentation next week. Should be alright. Presentations don't faze me none since I have been doing the stand up comedy thing for so long. I mean, nothing could be worse than having a set totally bomb. One time a few years ago I had this whole joke worked out that I thought would go over great. I can't remember much of it but it had something to do with pendants, (for the guys, those are the things on the ends of necklaces) and how you could get different ones made according to what you were doing that day. Like if you were going out to the bar and you wanted to hook up you would have a pendant that said, "Buy me a drink and let's talk about it." Or if you were going to your in-laws who constantly bugged you you would wear one that said, "No I haven't caught myself a nice boyfriend yet, Thanks."

I know. Even writing it after all this time, I can see it aint that funny.

But at the time I thought it might be. So I went up there at Yuk Yuk's in Hamilton and laid it on em and you could have heard someone grating soft cheese it was so quiet. The horror. The humiliation. I don't even think I had a clever retort for the non-laughter. I just stood there, shrugged and did an old joke to try to recover. But they were done with me. Basically it was just get off the stage.

Hard.

So presentations don't scare me. But I am looking forward to having it done. Then it is just the final exam and voila, one half credit down, one to go.

Geez it's eleven o clock. I had big plans for myself tonight. Guess I will just forget em and go down to the kitch and make myself a nice peanut butter and honey on toast. Then I will have a nice carb-induced sleep. I tell ya, its better than Gravol.

TTYL.

A.

Just another Manic Monday.

Sammy got his orange belt in karate! He did his kata really well, and all the other moves too. Proud of him. My own little Daniel-son.

We had a decent weekend. Hit a couple of bazaars on Saturday, which were not bad. They didnt have penny sales though. I live for penny sales! I love ripping my tickets and standing in great contemplation over which buckets to put them in. I used to put them in the prizes that I thought noone else would want, so my chances of winning were better. This was dumb. Because, yeah, I won a few things-- like a car shammy, the soundtrack from The Prince of Egypt, and a cheesy cutting board with fake grapes stuck to it-- but these arent things that I wanted to win. So now I am wiser, and bank on a few choice things with a lot of tickets. Last year I won an oil change and tune up for my car. (Geez, aim you are really spelling it out for em. I hope you would assume an oil change/tune up was for my car and not for like, my mother in law.)

Wait. Maybe that's what she needs...

Any HOO. It is november 22. Do you know where your Christmas decs are? I do, waiting for me in the cubby. Can't wait to get em out and put em up and plug em in. I want to paint a christmas scene on my front window. I was thinking I would take some images from Caillou's Merry Christmas book and use those. They seem nice and simple. And something about Caillous big bald head makes me happy.

Well, time to get to the dinner dishes. And all the other nineteen million things there are to do around here in the evening when I really should be sitting on my arse in front of the tv.

Ciao.
A,.

Miss dorky-malorky doesnt know how to put a link in her post so I guess you gotta copy and paste this address to get the blog for Adam Armstrong Price (see below)

members.shaw.ca/sandijim

Heroes.

Reading the paper today I came across stories of two people who I would not hesitate to admire.
First, Adam Armstrong Price.

This guy, from Stoney Creek, the father of newborn baby twins, is right now in the hospital fighting leukemia with everything he's got. He has a blog of his own and I implore you to read it. Be prepared, if you are the type to whine about a hangnail, to feel very small in the face of this guy's courage and strength and zero self pity. And if you are worth your salt, you will be inspired (as I was) to tone down the whine and shake off a bit of the pity.




The other one is Pat Wallace. She died November 7 of cancer. She was a Hamilton judge who made a trip to Haiti with her daughter and came back determined to help the people there. Even AFTER she was diagnosed with cancer, she kept on with fundraising and getting Childbirth kits together to send there, and putting up a website (joyandhopeofhaiti.ca) which will continue to do good long after she is gone.

Man.

I get caught up in the roundabout of daily annoyances like everyone else. But stuff like this knocks me off, even for a little while, and this is such a good thing. Kids are fighting. Wah. House is messy. Wah. Too much to do. Wah.

It's so important to just get over myself. Ain't it the truth.

Heroes. Alive and well in the Hammer.

Good on 'em.

A.

Oh havent I been a little neglectful blogger. Ah well, it gets like that around here, when you have a big essay due plus eye doctor appointments plus a house to clean plus three kids who do nothing but undo the cleaning plus ebay listing and then ebay packing and then ebay mailing plus book group plus Christmas shopping plus humour gigging plus cooking meals plus plus plus.

Class was pretty good tonight, about tatooing and body modification and plastic surgery and stuff. I would say something moderately intelligent but I got nada. It's all kind of a blur after ten thirty. Lets just sidle back to the mundane, shall we.

I did make date squares this morning and they turned out real good.

I am halfway done my Christmas shopping.

I need to get this frigging house cleaned up.

I am tired. Stayed up way late sunday and monday writing my paper. And today I felt like i was on spin cycle all day. Lucy WALKED today. She has been standing on her own and taking the odd step or two then she hits the ground on knees and hands and does her komodo dragon all over the place. But today she just walked across the living room! A little like a drunken sailor but what a sight to behold. She did it three times, taking six or seven steps, then she got tired but instead of crawling she put her hands down on the floor, then kept her legs straight with her little butt up in the air and walked on all fours for a while, it was hilarious.

So my lady luck is getting to be a big girl. Time for another one. HAH.

This Saturday I want to hit some bazaars. Love the bazaars for that hokey Christmas-kitsch and penny sales and smiley old ladies smoothing out knitted hats and things on the tables before them.

I think I have the most Christmas music of anyone i know. I have bought no less than five new cd's via ebay this year alone. Loving the Nettwerk Christmas album. If any of my peeps want a cd of my choice xmas pics let me know and I will burn you one. Just put a comment on here. If any of my long distance loveys want one I will mail one to you. Far be it for me to deprive AnYONE of good Christmas music. Ya just gotta have it.

Alright well. There is the kitchen to tidy and one basket of laundry to fold (again, thanks lucy) and I promised myself I would list five ebays tonight. So I better go.

Toodles.

A.

Long time no bloggy.


What day is it? Oh yeah. Wed. Today is flu shot day for me and the kids. We are going to Shoppers Drug Mart for our flu shots! My doc does them but with no appointments, just come as you are and wait two hours. Doesnt sound like my idea of a good time, stuck in a waiting room trying to occupy three kids for two hours. Blech. So we have an appointment at Sh. for three thirty lickety split poke poke poke heres your hat whatsyer hurry.

Terrible TErrible about that fire yesterday in West Lincoln. I don't even know what to think or say except "Why?" It makes me feel sick to think about all those kids.

If my kids all had to die at the same time, I would probably (if given a choice in the moment) want to die too. I remember Jay telling me about these two boys in his high school, Chris and Ken, who were brothers and were killed trying to drive over railroad tracks before a train came. They were 17 and 18, I think. And he went to the funeral and their mother was just devastated and kept trying to throw herself into their graves. He said it was awful. At the time (we were 17 ourselves) I thought it was crazy. Now I understand it.

Well, time to get everyone ready and out the door. And today, the sarcasm has been smacked out of me for once when I say,
Lucky me.

A.

Sometimes it's hard to be a parent.

Sam spent all this time yesterday drawing pictures of Inuyasha, who is a character from a cartoon that he is not allowed to watch anymore. He was real proud of his drawings and they were really good. So he rolls them up as he is leaving for school, he wants to show them to his friends.

I always watch him walk past our house to the bus stop from the dining room window. So he goes out and his two buddies are there, and he pulls out his pictures to show them. I can see by their faces that they are not impressed. (They are hard to impress.) I can see by the set of Sam's shoulders that he is upset.

So they walk to the stop and Sam comes to the window (as he usually does, because I lift Monty up on the buffet and have Lucy in my arms and we all say goodbye.)

His little face.

I can tell he is a little bit devastated. I say, "Did you show them your pictures?"
He nods.
"What did they say, buddy?"
"They said I got Inuyasha's face all wrong."

I could have throttled them. My Sam, so pleased with his drawings one minute and then the next minute he is folding up the papers and shoving them in his pocket.

What can you do? I say, "Your drawings are great, bud. Maybe they would like to be able to draw as well as you, eh?"

He nods.

I say, "what are they, expert illustrators of Inuyasha noses?"

He laughs a bit. He swallows.

I want to bring him back inside. I want to hug him and keep him away from any kid who would make him feel like this. I want to home school him.

But I also have this feeling that this is life. That this is what the real world has to offer sometimes.

Disappointment. Rejection. Crumbs.

So I let him go. It kills me. But it must be done. He will be fine. He, like all boys who grow up to be men, has to take his knocks and learn for himself that he can still stand. How ever would we learn how to deal with shit if we were protected from it all our lives?

And yet, even as I write this, the tendrils of my mother heart are still unfurling towards my boy. Still seeking him and loving him and sending him telepathic strands of encouragement.

He will be okay. I may not recover, but the kid'll do alright.

He is so getting extra Halloween candy when he gets home.

A.

Home from class. Too late to bother watching CSI NY. Jay is taping it for me, so no worries. I am kind of tired. Class was alright. It was all about SEX. Well, pornography to be specific. We talked about anti-porn vs um, pro-porn(?), Hustler Magazine, sex as an ideology, and a bunch of other stuff that my brain is too tired to remember. It was kind of overwhelming. I mean you could start today to try to find out about all the different types of sexual things in our culture and someone would find you maybe in six or seven years or so, half crazy and still not finished getting through everything.

So I probably won't be exploring this part of the course for my essay. I will, however, have to explore something by next wednesday if I want to do better than a crummy C. And wouldntcha know I have two gigs with my ma, one on Friday one on Saturday. So I have to use a few watts of brain juice to remember my stand up bits for those. So I realistically won't be starting until Saturday afternoon. I may have to lock myself in my car to get some peace and quiet to read and write. You know, I always think of my neighbors houses. Half of them are just with these older couples living there, I wish I could just say, 'Hey Tony, do you mind if I go up to one of your spare bedrooms and do some homework?' That way I would have no travel time, would be right next door if anyone needed me for anything, and I would be able to think a thought without the song from Bob the Builder in my head.

That reminds me. When Monty started watching Bob the Builder a few years ago I used to get very disturbed by the opening song. I am over it now, but one line where they say the names of some of the characters is "Scoop, Muck and Busy", and to me it sounded far too close to "Soup F**kin' Busy". It used to freak me out. Say it (the first one) yourself, you will see what I mean.

Other than this fascinating tidbit of information I am mentally tapped out. Time for a bath.

Night night. Or guten morgen I suppose.

Chewsday evening, 7:03 pm.

Taking a minute up in my room. Okay, five. Luca is pulling all the stuff out of the two bottom drawers of my dresser and one by one putting things around her neck and then flinging them. Hey, I forgot about those pajama bottoms. Eggbert is watching Little Bear. Sammy is down at Oma's doing his homework. Hopefully. He has been off school for two days with The Cough.

Daddy no home yet. Maybe by eight. I took the kids for a drive after school just to make the afterschool to dinner time go faster. It kind of worked. I think I am having a blood sugar crash right about now. Let's do the tally, shall we?

1 rockets
1 Jolly Rancher Lollypop (okay half, they caught me and I had to share.)
2 little mini Crunchie bars.
1 mini Kit Kat bar minus a bite for Monty
1 turtles turtle. (Not sure which ritzy house gave those out but I am wishing now we had doubled back on that one. Wait. No, I am not.)
1 little Caramilk (1 measly square, what's up with that.)

That is today's candy toll for me. It could be worse.

Hell.

It could always be worse, couldn't it? I coulda ate the whole damn bag. Back in the eating-disordered days I coulda. But i am happy to say that after years of nonsense and then hard, hard WORK, I don't have to eat the whole bag. I don't even want to.

So looking at the above tally of candy consumed a little at a time over 12 hours actually makes me kind of proud of myself.

Weird.

Peace out. (Or as we candy lovers say, Piece out.)

Halloween Hijinks at the Forderers.
This was taken just before Trick or Treating. Monty is Darth Vader (sort of), Lucy is a Hydrangea, and Sam is, of course, Harry P.



We had FUN. We went to all our neighbors houses and Monty was lit up running from pumpkin to pumpkin and saying "THANK YOU!" before "Trick or Treat!" Lucy kept going, "Daaeee!" (DaddY) and Jay would say, "Yes Luca!" and she would go "Waaooow!" and point to everything. I have to say it was cute even after the Fifty-first time.

They got great stuff. I am going to start in on gaining the ole Christmas five (lbs that is) sooner than expected. Monty woke up this morning and before his eyes were even opened he said, "Can I have my Candy?!" Jay said, "No, buddy, not in the morning. Monty said, "Can I look at my Candy?"

We didnt have as many kids as last year. What a shame, eh. Leftover food kinda sucks. Leftover candy rocks.

A.