Saturday, November 12, 2005

Workin' At The Mall

I did my first shift at the candle booth last night. It wasn't bad. It is a pretty big booth, and I must have walked around it six hundred and forty eight times. My eyes were tired by the end! It wasn't that busy, so you know how it is when you are trying to sort of look busy, I windexed the glass and straightened the boxes of candle holders, walked around. I wanted to sit on my little stool more but I am too friggin short and when I was sitting on there I could barely see over the top of the candles if there were customers looking or not. I sat on my foot for a bit for some height but then my foot fell asleep.

I was nervous when I got there! What a weiner. Not because it is some high power job ha ha, but I haven't worked outside my house in like, five years. And I had to do the wheelin and dealin babysitting tango before I left. Each kid went somewhere different. So by the time I got there my stomach was all knotted up from being outside my comfort zone. Blech.

The girl that was there in the day trained me for an hour. And just before she was leaving I went to get a tea and to hit the bathroom, because I would be alone for four hours, no breaky breaky. So I am walking with all this cash register/debit/credit card information in my head. I had a pretty good handle on it. I got a tea and walked back, feeling a little sassy in my criss cross top and tweed Aline skirt and maroon boots.
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But I must have been too in my head. Because then I walked INTO A WALL.
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I didn't see the corner. And OOF! My tea went all over. One side of my short, spiky hairdo went flat. And I felt like a complete and utter idiot.
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Luckily alot of other people at the mall must have been in their own heads like i was, because as far as I could tell, nobody really noticed. In the movies that would have been the part where Julia Roberts or Sandra Bullock crashes into the wall like a beautiful klutz and lands in the arms of some hunk. In real life you just kind of look around like 'who put that wall there?' and then when you see that noone really noticed you sort of walk away from the scene of the crime, wiping the tea off your hands onto your skirt because it is brown and anyway already has tea on it.
And then you do your four hours at the candle booth. And then you go home.



At 1:38 AM, Blogger mrtl said...


At 9:33 PM, Blogger kalki said...

The illustrations are killing me. I blove your tea-spilling self.

At 10:22 PM, Blogger Cat said...

Wow, great illustrations! I feel just as if I were THERE...

I can't... stop... laughing...
Hee! And OW.

Poor, sassy in her criss-cross top, tweed Aline skirt, and maroon boots Amy!

Do you get free candles? Because that would be awesome.

At 8:04 AM, Blogger jennifer said...

oh amy! that is so funny and so very you! love the pics. loved catching up on your blog after 6 weeks of being away. it reads like a good book.

At 9:31 AM, Blogger Colleen said...

Poor you!!!

But as the days pass and the season gets closer, the mall is bound to get busier...and next time (should there be one), I bet you do land in the arms of a sexy hunk!!!

At 9:36 AM, Blogger Effie said...

I don't know how many times I've tried to look cute or sassy and then bumped into something (yes, sometimes even a wall!)

LOVE your illustrations--so cute! I'm glad your first night wasn't too bad! I'll have to do some candle shopping soon....

At 9:45 AM, Blogger LadyBug said...

I LOVE your play-by-play drawings. TOO cute.

I'm glad your first night went well. And you're not a weiner. Everyone gets nervous their first day on the job.

HUGS to you, Amy.

At 3:55 PM, Blogger SoozieQ said...

Your drawings crack me up EVERY time I see them. You are so funny.

Sorry you walked into a wall...I would have laughed if I had seen that though. I have a TERRIBLE sense of humor when it comes to those types of things.

BUT, I would have laughed even harder had *I* walked into a wall.

At 9:19 PM, Blogger Jenn said...

I think I just peed my self from teh halarious description... as well as teh icing on the cake your illustrations.
Amy my god your are funny.
they are looking for a canadian stand up act to try out for a spot on corner gas... you my dear should so enter.
thanks you for making me laugh out loud AGAIN and hey your outfit was looking very hip and very sassy.

At 12:46 PM, Blogger Heather said...

Congrats on the job Amy...I'm very sure that you are going to do a there..:) I think I'd be dangerous in a candle place as my husband doesn't exactly have an affinity for the things. And I loved the illustrations as well, by the way. Unfortunately, I DO have an affinity for walking into walls so I feel your pain..:)

At 5:52 PM, Blogger eclectic said...

Shouldn't that title read: "Workin' at the Wall"? THAT was hysterical!! But I so understand the need to not be on call to wipe any other person's butt or nose, even for a brief period of time. Go you! This little foray into retail should provide lots of blog fodder if nothing else...!

At 11:50 PM, Blogger Ern said...

That is too funny! And pictures too? Classic.

At 5:51 PM, Blogger Susie said...

You look really hot in your tweed skirt and boots, though :)

At 10:05 PM, Blogger Ivy the Goober said...

omg you HAVE to let me link to this on my sidebar under the heading "peed my pants reading this" :)

At 8:54 AM, Blogger mckay said...

yeah, where are the hunky men to catch us when we bump into walls, fall down steps and ride bikes into parked cars??!

my life's script needs a rewrite.


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